Last night I went out to visit my friend Hillary at ‘The Farm’. She and her husband Bruce have a plot of land out in Lake Point UT with horses, goats, chickens, cats, a garden, and a dog. I am especially attached to her dog (Bella) since I am her god-dog-mommy.
I found a perfect photo opportunity with a chicken nestled in next to some hay and just as I was about to snap a picture, Bella comes charging around the corner, startled the chicken and totally photo-bombed me!
We hung out outside, had a fire, watched the animals be joyful, sipped cocktails and visited. It was all-in-all a perfect evening and made me even more excited to create that kind of space in Alabama.
We wrapped up the evening by doing a Rune reading (it was my first one and SO much fun). The tiles were spot on to my current situation and brought me some much needed peace about my choice to up and leave my home, job, friends and family to explore bigger horizons.
Back in February, I was SOOO over winter and needed to feel some earth on my hands and participate in the magic of creation. So my son Levi and I brought in a giant plastic storage bin full of dirt (okay, Levi brought in the dirt it was really heavy), covered the dining room table with a canvas drop cloth, turned on some music and started planting.
My seeds have since tuned into seedlings, and it made my heart happy every day watching them grow.
I was also given an opportunity to rethink about a concept that Aaron (my brother) and I have been discussing… Sometimes we have things from our past (childhood, DNA, beliefs) that used to be really helpful, but now no longer serve us. But we are scared to get rid of it or change it. I think seeing the outer shell of this seed hitch-hiking on the plant is such great visual representation of that. The shell was vital to the seeds’ future at one point and time, but now is stunting the leaf’s ability to blossom because of limited light and space.
I wonder how many ‘hitch-hikers’ that I can get rid of this year. Even if it makes me a late-bloomer; thinking it is finally time for me to let my leaves grow.
Now of course I have to figure out what I am going to do with all these plants… can’t really transport seedlings cross country 🙁 Maybe the community gardens will take them?
Putting down roots in hard for a gypsy. I have managed to move every two to three years for my whole life. I am pro at creating events that “require” me to move (read: a not-my-fault set of circumstances that allows me to indulge my gypsy soul while still seeming normal).
Recently my sister located my fathers birth parents. It was weird. I felt emotions that I hadn’t experienced before. My entire extended family is all decidedly LDS, and I am decidedly not. My entire immediate family all struggle with the same gypsy tendencies I do, so we all float our own direction and sometimes cross paths. Feeling disconnected from my family was normal.
Our new-found Aunt sent a lovely care package. A family history book, a family recipe book, and a book she wrote. Apparently I come from a long genetic line of really bad-ass women.
Now my whole definition of family looked different. My inner beliefs about what I needed and wanted were suddenly insufficient. My being okay with feeling disconnected crumbled. I wanted – no, NEEDED to learn more, to connect, to touch souls. After a moment of panic, I did what any ‘normal’ person would do. I called my life coach aka, mentor, friend, pirate, Megan. We met for tea (cause she is cool like that). After much rambling on my part, she brought me clarity with one word.
Of course that immediately turned into fun as we decided that the title of my next project with her would be ‘Roots & Boots’. I had just bought some new ‘adventure’ boots for my upcoming Alabama move – cause a girl’s gotta be ready for anything life presents. Especially when it includes the potentially messy task of finding (or creating or growing) some roots.
A few months ago I finally came out of the closet. My 9-5 professional job, my appearance, my preferences, my lifestyle were all just a cover-up. A desperate attempt to fit in with the masses and feel normal, be okay. Truth? I am a dirty hippie at heart, a gypsy in my soul, and anything but normal. It was a painful experience; for everyone but me. Jaws dropped, tongues wouldn’t work, eyes stared, confusion abounded, denial set it.
Aligning my life with my truth (aka integrity) is my new mission. So… I am moving to Alabama. Deep south, ocean, fresh seafood, land, gardens, humidity, LOTS of Jesus, warmth, y’all, sweet tea. No – I have never lived there. No – I don’t have family there. No – I am not moving there for a man. No – I don’t have a plan. Yes – I am happier than I have been in 20 years.